{"id":2454443,"date":"2020-02-12T05:00:00","date_gmt":"2020-02-12T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.aspentimes.com\/?p=320736"},"modified":"2020-02-12T05:00:00","modified_gmt":"2020-02-12T12:00:00","slug":"britta-gustafson-what-is-love-you-tell-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/local-news\/britta-gustafson-what-is-love-you-tell-me\/","title":{"rendered":"Britta Gustafson: What is love? You tell me"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Love. It\u2019s a many-splendored thing, it\u2019s all you need and sometimes it\u2019s even a battlefield.<\/p>\n

But when it comes to matters of the heart, how does one begin to put a finger on the pulse of what keeps us palpitating?<\/p>\n

Searching for answers to a force larger than life, how does a once bitten, twice shy divorc\u00e9e, like myself, even begin to approach the subject? I determined I would have no choice but to explore its depths with wide-open awe and wonder. After all I know love, both unconditional and unrequited. As a mother, I understand it to be all encompassing. I\u2019ve watched my parent\u2019s love grow, testing each of the traditional wedding vows, proving its power and a testament to time with their 50th wedding anniversary on the horizon this year. I hold onto the realization that our own fragile nature on this planet lends itself to an innate need for us to greatly invest ourselves in that which we could easily lose. These connections are what compel us into action, to protect and nurture. I know that my definition of \u201clove\u201d has completely evolved and taken on whole new dimensions at this stage in my life. And those layers of love, the ones we collect over time, inevitably teach us about who we really are in return.<\/p>\n

I scoffed at Valentine\u2019s Day, calling it commercial, when my 10-year-old\u2019s response was a shocked, \u201cWhy wouldn\u2019t you love a day that reminds us to love?\u201d She\u2019s right. Commercial as it may be, it is part of our cultural experience here and so I set out to embrace its beauty. And really, is there any better way to celebrate Valentine\u2019s Day than by celebrating what love means to those around us? As Plato put it, \u201cAt the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.\u201d<\/p>\n

So I decided to reach out, calling on friends, family, neighbors, colleagues and my community, from kids to professionals to couples, who have long and passionate love stories to share. I simply asked, \u201cWhat is love?\u201d And here is what you, the people of Snowmass Village, told\/taught me:<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is the root of everything; love creates, but a lack of love can destroy \u2026 therefore love is life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTo me love means knowing that someone isn\u2019t perfect and loving their imperfections as well as their strengths.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is patient, love is kind and is inside us and forgiving, even when we aren\u2019t patient and kind.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is an act of expression, kindness, giving. It is gentle and not arrogant.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is undefinable, it\u2019s an innate feeling you can\u2019t seem to find the perfect words to describe.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove has helped me survive the most difficult times. It provides us strength when we are most weak.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s like a spider\u2019s web that keeps us off the ground, but in which we can also find ourselves tangled at times.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is universal. There is an overarching Anthropology of love. Evidence of love has been found in 170 societies around the world, and no single society has been found that did not have it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s craziness \u2014when you can\u2019t tell the difference between intense pain and intense pleasure.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen something exterior takes over your internal narrative\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is that split second when you smile involuntarily.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the beginning of everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFeeling compelled to act from a place of pure altruism, putting all selfishness aside and acting from a place of virtuous kindness.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA broken heart, though very real, is a risk worth taking in pursuit of love.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is making a choice to abandon looking inward, and to look outward to others. It is available to us all, and we can love everything, but that is the test.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s when reason and rational are no longer in the driver\u2019s seat.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is a very real function of the brain, in the ventral tegmental area (VTA): a tiny factor near the base of the brain. Activity occurs in the a10 cells which produce dopamine and spray it to many brain regions when you feel love. The VTA is part of the reptilian core of the brain, way below the cognitive thinking process, below emotions, it is part of the brain reward system which is associated with wanting, motivation, focus and craving. It\u2019s activity response is comparable to our compulsions to eat, protect ourselves and survive.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is when you hold your child for the first time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove means support, adoration and friendship.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is a feeling you can only get when you truly, truly care for someone, and that someone doesn\u2019t always have to be family. They could be a close friend or a pet.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI love M. Scott Peck\u2019s definition of love \u2026 extending one\u2019s self for the purpose of nurturing one\u2019s own or another\u2019s spiritual growth. The manifestations of that are endless \u2026 it\u2019s been my purpose and my pleasure to live that definition. The connection it creates is bomber solid \u2026 and love means everything to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove means contentment. The feeling that no matter what, your life has served an enormous purpose.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFriendship for a long time if your life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKissy, Kissy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFriendship and helping others.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA tingly feeling in your heart, when you feel very affectionate for someone. The uncontrollable feeling to keep family and friends close forever.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLove is peace of mind.\u201d<\/p>\n

And sometimes it\u2019s hard to put into words as my 3-year-old niece expressed, responding matter-of-factly to my question by throwing her tiny arms around me and pushing my hand in hers, against my chest.<\/p>\n

As I quizzically rooted for answers, I had an unexpected, almost cathartic experience. With a surging renewal in my faith for love, I can honestly say that I felt that dopamine rush, taking a vicarious voyage through the pulsing hearts around our town. Snowmass, you made me laugh and cry, gain perspective and admiration for you, and I fell just a little more deeply in love with my home this week!<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s exchange a piece of my mind for a little peace of mind; after all, if we always agree what will we talk about? Britta Gustafson appreciates an open mind; share yours and email her at brittag@ymail.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n

via:: The Aspen Times<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Love. It\u2019s a many-splendored thing, it\u2019s all you need and sometimes it\u2019s even a battlefield. But when it comes to matters of the heart, how does one begin to put a finger on the pulse of what keeps us palpitating? Searching for answers to a force larger than life, how does a once bitten, twice […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[49],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2454443","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-local-news"],"acf":[],"publishpress_future_action":{"enabled":false,"date":"2026-08-18 16:01:39","action":"change-status","newStatus":"draft","terms":[],"taxonomy":"category","extraData":[]},"publishpress_future_workflow_manual_trigger":{"enabledWorkflows":[]},"distributor_meta":false,"distributor_terms":false,"distributor_media":false,"distributor_original_site_name":"KSPN The Valley's Quality Rock","distributor_original_site_url":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn","push-errors":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2454443","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2454443"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2454443\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2454443"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2454443"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alwaysmountaintime.com\/kspn\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2454443"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}