Lizzy Caplan has a story that may very well make you pee your pants.
During a Thursday night appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, the Mean Girls alum shared an unfortunate yet hilarious tale about her very English, very polite husband Tom Riley, a urinal and an innocent bystander.
“I like that he tends to get into, like, the most embarrassing, humiliating situations on Earth,” the actress explained to host Jimmy Kimmel. “And when they occur in England, because of the polite society, it’s, like, 10 times better.”
Case in point: A recent date night we’re sure her husband would call a horror story. While at a theater in England, the actor ran off to the bathroom during intermission. Totally normal, right? Well…
“He abruptly returns,” the 37-year-old recalled. “He sits down next to me and I look at him and he’s just looking straight ahead. And he’s pale, like, white as a ghost.”
“I could see in his face that what he was about to tell me was a gift,” she continued. “It would bring me endless joy forever. He said that he was at the urinal and he went to spit his gum into said urinal, which I had questions about. Do people do that? He said sometimes men do that.”
Or, as Kimmel quipped back, “Men with impeccable manners do not do that.”
Point taken, back to Caplan. We’re almost at the climax!
“So, he went to spit the gum, but it got caught,” she admitted. “He said, ‘It got caught on my lip and then it tumbled down. And then, I followed it with my eyes and then, almost as if it were in slow motion, I saw it bounce off the man standing next to me’s penis.'”
Horrifying.
“I was just like, ‘Yes!'” she raved. “It, like, washed over me. Like, ‘Oh my God. This is like a gift, like Christmas. Thank you.'”
And of course, English men have a very English reaction to even the most awkward situations ever.
“I was like, ‘Well, what did he do? Was he mad?” Caplan quipped. “In America, I would assume you’d get punched in the face or something.’ And he just said, ‘He apologized.'”
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